Revolutionary Love & Resilience is a 3-month cutting-edge somatic therapy/coaching fusion that connects with the body, heart, and mind to heal what holds you back and tap into empowered, deeply connected and alive parts of yourself that you already have (they just might need some uncovering). It is rooted in attachment theory and somatic psychotherapy with an extra flare of integrative sex, love and relationship coaching where applicable. It is very deeply trauma informed, inclusive and LGBTQ+ affirming.

There’s this incredible WILL in people, a desire for MORE.

They KNOW deep inside that there’s a way to connect with other people and with life from a place of deep love, presence & receptivity, but for some it’s so hard to find their way to this place.

And so we go to therapist after therapist, healer after healer, and attend so many workshops and classes, looking for the way in - the missing piece of the puzzle that we’re so sure is there. The missing piece that will tap us into our aliveness and radiance.  The aha that connects us to the life we want and to the relationships we desire.

And it’s SO DISAPPOINTING when we don’t find what we’re looking for. 

 
tanja-heffner-155367.jpg

Despite all the workshops and classes and therapists we’re still not thriving in the way we’d hoped to by now even though we’re really good at appearing to be just fine on the outside.

We KNOW we’re powerful humans, we KNOW we’re worthy of the love we want, but we’re STILL stuck in so much of that old stuff.

It’s deeply lonely, feeling like we’re on the outside of life, looking in - longing for connection with our most authentic self and life.

 
 

What do you believe about who you are?

 
straight-couple.jpg
 
 
 

Truth is... pleasure, aliveness,joy and
boldness are already in you.

 
want-banner2.png

How do we work with this deep loneliness, the anxiety, the disappointment that we’re not thriving in the way we hoped (and know, deep inside) is possible?

So often people come to me wanting tools to be able to relate better in their partnerships or wanting to believe they can truly call in the partnership they desire, so then they can start feeling better. Not feel so depressed or not feel so anxious or not feel so insecure and really be able to step into their power and be who they know they are deep inside. 

couples6.png

It looks so much different when they come to me versus when they leave. It’s amazing what can happen in the course of a few months together. There’s an aliveness, a lift, a fullness in their voices, a strength in their boundaries, in the ways they carry their bodies. 

I’m thinking of one client in particular who carried a lot of trauma but didn’t know it was considered trauma. He really suffered from a lot of self doubt. He had so many amazing ideas and things he wanted to do in the world, but kept getting really stuck. Including in his partnership. He couldn’t quite ever let himself have what he wanted or be who he wanted to be, because of all the beliefs he came in with and ways he was taught. 

When he left he had stepped into an entirely new career, he’d committed to his partnership in a way that felt good to him, instead of in the way he thought he was supposed to because that’s how culture says he was supposed to. He was using his voice and communicating things to his family, his friends, his boss, his partner, in ways he never could have imagined because he didn’t know he was able to. 

He was honoring the fact that he has needs and he has desires, and they don’t have to be in the back seat. He was stepping into his own importance.

What I’ve seen through working with countless clients is it’s not the tools that creates this shift, that gives people the aliveness and sense of possibility in their lives and relationships. 

It’s Revolutionary Love.

 

You are enough.
Start where you are with what you have.

 
banner-e2.png
 
 
 

What if your wounds could be medicine?

 
medi.png

Revolutionary love is not fluffy. It’s not woo woo. It’s a willingness to be with ourselves no matter what. No matter how challenged we feel, no matter how deeply in pain we feel, no matter how broken we think we are, it’s a willingness to stay with whatever we’re feeling, no matter if it’s absolute joy and bliss or the depths of sorrow and tragedy, or anywhere in between. 

DSC02005.jpg

Revolutionary love is being willing, no matter how uncomfortable it is, and how much vulnerability it takes, how much work it takes to be devoted to our own hearts, our own unique paths, our own spirituality, to be unwavering and unstoppable.

Revolutionary Love isn’t necessarily an easy path. It takes commitment and it takes courage, and it takes support - which can be so hard for so many of us to ask for and to receive. It’s not an easy path but it’s SO worthwhile.

With revolutionary love our lives become more stable. We feel more secure, in who we are in our connections, what we need and want from people. We learn we’re allowed to have that stability, we learn we’re allowed to trust connection.

We’re more independent in ways we want to be independent. We’re in our purpose and it’s easy to be in our purpose. We don’t have to pull for it or muscle through it. We’re in clarity with what we’re doing, where we’re going, who our people are, where our sense of belonging is.

And when we feel a lack of clarity, we’re also there for it, with space. And we embrace it with care and curiosity instead of fighting it and telling ourselves stories like I’m not good enough, I’m not worthy enough, I’m not meant for this. All the sorts of things we do to ourselves to try to prove to ourselves that we are the people who we learned how to be through the shitty experiences we’ve had in our lives.

We learn to do the opposite, where we reclaim our lives and our empowerment and our connection, our sense of community and safety and belonging. 

Fire-and-earth-small.png

And in turn, we thrive.

Because we feel so centred, so stable, so with ourselves, regardless of the storms and the ups and downs that life brings us. Because it does, it’s not going to be calm and peaceful 100% of the time. 

When we have Revolutionary Love, we are unwavering, because we know where our anchor is, and it’s right here. And it’s in my connections to the people I love who have my back.


 

To know your true worth

you've got to embody

and I mean really embody

Revolutionary Love.

 
true worrth2.png

What will working together look like?

working together.jpg
 

It will be a 3 month adventure. Our work together may include dialogue, guidance through inner emotional processes to heal old wounds, body-based in-session and at-home practices that integrate the emotional work and help sustain positive growth in the direction of your desires.

 

Here’s what you can expect:

  • 3-month of weekly 1-Hour Confidential one-on-one Online Video or Phone Sessions exploring your desires and experiencing deep embodiment practices to realize those desires and addressing everything that’s in the way.

  • At-Home Practices tailored uniquely to you to transform your relationship to your mind, body and heart and increase inner and outer love, safety, pleasure, empowerment and aliveness. Examples of possible practices include meditation, visualization, breathwork, Jade Egg, pleasure practices, expression through sounding, movement, writing and creativity.

  • Email support to increase accountability, motivation and clarity.

  • The journey comes to you: We can meet virtually from anywhere in the world. You experience sessions from the comfort and privacy of your own home.

 

Don’t compare your progress to that of others.

We need our own time to travel our own distance.

 
banner-sh3.png

CLIENT TESTIMONIALS

Brooke.png

I feel beyond fortunate to have been a recipient of Shelby’s incredible gifts. I have never met someone who is SO present and able to take people as deep as they are ready to go. The first time I worked with her I was in disbelief at how she was able to hold space for me to help me come to my deepest truths. The word that comes to mind when I think of working with Shelby is nourished. She has an ability in every session to help my mind, body and soul feel so held and so filled up with love, that it makes even going through the toughest darkest stuff, actually somewhat pleasurable. Shelby is also an incredible educator and I always feel like there is something I learn from her whenever I work with her. Please do your heart and soul a favor and work with this incredible woman.

    – Brooke Hayes, Sex Love and Relationship Coach, Encenitas, California


I turned to Shelby for coaching at a time when I felt incredibly vulnerable.  A huge issue from my past that I thought I had healed from had reared its head again, and I felt shame, alone and not sure if I could belong.  Shelby held me with such incredible tenderness and compassion, and I felt 100% seen and heard in all of my pain, but also in all of my aliveness.  Through my work with Shelby I took back my power, and had the courage to speak my truth. The work with Shelby continued to vibrate and unfold in me long after the sessions finished - I went from a hot wavering mess to feeling strong and vibrant.  I feel very blessed to have experienced the power, wisdom and gentleness of Shelby’s presence and skills and, as a coach myself, I truly appreciate Shelby as one of the very, very best.

– SJ Chapman, Executive Coach and Organisational Development Consultant, Melbourne, Australia


Roshni.png

Shelby is utterly present during sessions and a true master at what she does. She cares deeply for her clients, and it shows. As a result of working with her, I've been able to move forward in situations where I've previously felt stuck, and experienced the huge relief and permission to not have to be perfect! I've experienced a deep, profound connection to myself, in Shelby's presence. If you have a chance to work with Shelby, I highly, highly recommend it. Thank you Shelby, for being such a loving, gifted, dedicated and passionate practitioner.

– Roshni Dominic, Coach, United Kingdom 

 

Embracing is the antidote to despair… I’ll show you how.

 
last8.png

Are you interested in working with me?

Here’s how to get started.

 
DSC02311.jpg
 

Step 1. Fill out your application form here. These questions help you get super clear on what you want from working together, and let me get to know you a little.

Step 2. Watch your email for an email from me in the next few days - if we’re a good fit for working together, we’ll schedule a complimentary, no-obligation consult. We’ll spend an hour together getting clear on what you want, what’s in the way, and even if we decide working together isn’t right for you, you’ll leave with some clarity and a sense of what to do next.

Step 3. At the scheduled time of your consult, we’ll consult! We’ll use the opportunity to make sure we’re the perfect fit before you commit..

Step 4. Then we’ll get started! If you decide to work with me, I’ll tell you the exact steps for getting started. If you decide not to work with me or if we aren’t a perfect fit, I’m happy to share other resources to help you get what you need.